Socialization Essay
Society has taught Americans to have trends, style, dreams and goals. While society has taught us these things, on the other hand, society has made some of us insecure, depressed, and feel “flawed”. This is socialization, the study of our world today. Society has taught me to be insecure, depressed, feeling the need to be perfect and to follow the norms of the manbox. Society has made me hide these feelings behind this mask (the one in front of you). On the right side of my mask, it shows a happy strong person, who is fine and following the ways of socialization perfectly. On the side that is falling apart, it shows the depressed, insecure, cut side, the feelings I hide from friends, family, peers, etc. Stephen Chbosky said in The Perks of being a Wallflower “So this is my life, and I want you to know that I am both happy and sad, and I’m still trying to figure out how this could be” and I believe this is the best way to describe me. Society is cruel, and it has socialized us in cruel ways as well, such as being manly and being what society tells us what is “perfect”. But why are we naive, why have we fallen for societies trap?
Society has taught boys to become a man, or become manly on societies standards. In a video called “a Call to Men” Tony Porter Acknowledges “to break free of the manbox…” This manbox is a theoretical box of what it takes to be a man. Tony Porter, the man who explained the manbox said, “There was a time in my life where we had a very troubled experience in our family. My brother, Henry, he died tragically when we were teenagers... and no sooner than the women got out, he burst out crying. He didn't want cry in front of me, but he knew he wasn't going to make it back to the city, and it was better me than to allow himself to express these feelings and emotions in front of the women. And this is a man who, 10 minutes ago, had just put his teenage son in the ground --something I just can't even imagine. The thing that sticks with me the most is that he was apologizing to me for crying in front of me, and at the same time, he was also giving me props, lifting me up, for not crying.” When he says ‘He’ he means his father, the manliest person he knew. That is what society has done to men. Made us hide our feelings from women and be strong, mean, emotionless. If you cry in front of women, you are no man. If you are weak, and a coward, you are no man. If you are gay, you're not a man. This is what society has lead us to believe and to become. There is this show I have watched, and a character in the show says “a real man would...” and “so be a man!”. Media like this manipulates boys to think that we must be strong to be a man, we must do what the manbox tells us. But what if one man ignored the manbox? Would he be made fun of by the other men? be oppressed to become a “man” again? I can assure you I am not what society says a man should be and I am proud of that fact. This idea of a manbox has influenced men to become mean, and uncaring, and an emotionless person. Tony porter asked his son, "What would life be like for you, if you didn't have to adhere to this man box?" He said, "I would be free."
Society has also programed our naive brains to make us feel the need to be “perfect”. In my life, I haven’t been perfect on societies standards, but I have this pressure to be, and its always nagging at me in the back of my brain. And I have always felt this pressure to be perfect, and I am not the only one. Most everyone feels this pressure. Lets take an insecure girl, for example. She has the stress to be skinny, have a leg gap, have good hair, a pimple free face, and everything else. But not everyone can do this. We are all perfect in our own ways, but society has a specific goal or a specific perfect that everyone follows. How has this idea been spread? The media. The very phone in your pocket, or the computer in your backpack, or the television at home, all these are spreading this idea of a “flawless person”. But this person does not exist, but a sheer dream. People don't know this though, we are too gullible to know what Photoshop has done to men or women. But we all strive towards an impossible goal.
But why are we playing societies game? If we were not socialized, we would be called a feral child. A feral child is an uncivilized being, who does not act human, but such as an animal.
So its a lose-lose situation both ways. If we don't become socialized we act like animals, literally. If we are socialized we have to deal with socialization, because from birth we are becoming socialized, acting like our superiors and role models. Socialization is unavoidable, thus we are society’s puppets.
Even though I am saying all this negative stuff about socialization, its not all that bad. Some people have impressingly gone against the cycle of socialization, not becoming a feral child but starting their own trends and ways, our own styles and ways of life. They create a new community in our larger community. We are all capable of doing this, but most of us are afraid of change. If we weren’t afraid of this change, we wouldn't have to do what the manbox says, or try to be perfect, we could be free.
Society has taught boys to become a man, or become manly on societies standards. In a video called “a Call to Men” Tony Porter Acknowledges “to break free of the manbox…” This manbox is a theoretical box of what it takes to be a man. Tony Porter, the man who explained the manbox said, “There was a time in my life where we had a very troubled experience in our family. My brother, Henry, he died tragically when we were teenagers... and no sooner than the women got out, he burst out crying. He didn't want cry in front of me, but he knew he wasn't going to make it back to the city, and it was better me than to allow himself to express these feelings and emotions in front of the women. And this is a man who, 10 minutes ago, had just put his teenage son in the ground --something I just can't even imagine. The thing that sticks with me the most is that he was apologizing to me for crying in front of me, and at the same time, he was also giving me props, lifting me up, for not crying.” When he says ‘He’ he means his father, the manliest person he knew. That is what society has done to men. Made us hide our feelings from women and be strong, mean, emotionless. If you cry in front of women, you are no man. If you are weak, and a coward, you are no man. If you are gay, you're not a man. This is what society has lead us to believe and to become. There is this show I have watched, and a character in the show says “a real man would...” and “so be a man!”. Media like this manipulates boys to think that we must be strong to be a man, we must do what the manbox tells us. But what if one man ignored the manbox? Would he be made fun of by the other men? be oppressed to become a “man” again? I can assure you I am not what society says a man should be and I am proud of that fact. This idea of a manbox has influenced men to become mean, and uncaring, and an emotionless person. Tony porter asked his son, "What would life be like for you, if you didn't have to adhere to this man box?" He said, "I would be free."
Society has also programed our naive brains to make us feel the need to be “perfect”. In my life, I haven’t been perfect on societies standards, but I have this pressure to be, and its always nagging at me in the back of my brain. And I have always felt this pressure to be perfect, and I am not the only one. Most everyone feels this pressure. Lets take an insecure girl, for example. She has the stress to be skinny, have a leg gap, have good hair, a pimple free face, and everything else. But not everyone can do this. We are all perfect in our own ways, but society has a specific goal or a specific perfect that everyone follows. How has this idea been spread? The media. The very phone in your pocket, or the computer in your backpack, or the television at home, all these are spreading this idea of a “flawless person”. But this person does not exist, but a sheer dream. People don't know this though, we are too gullible to know what Photoshop has done to men or women. But we all strive towards an impossible goal.
But why are we playing societies game? If we were not socialized, we would be called a feral child. A feral child is an uncivilized being, who does not act human, but such as an animal.
So its a lose-lose situation both ways. If we don't become socialized we act like animals, literally. If we are socialized we have to deal with socialization, because from birth we are becoming socialized, acting like our superiors and role models. Socialization is unavoidable, thus we are society’s puppets.
Even though I am saying all this negative stuff about socialization, its not all that bad. Some people have impressingly gone against the cycle of socialization, not becoming a feral child but starting their own trends and ways, our own styles and ways of life. They create a new community in our larger community. We are all capable of doing this, but most of us are afraid of change. If we weren’t afraid of this change, we wouldn't have to do what the manbox says, or try to be perfect, we could be free.